Gray & Loving It

As I was driving to work a few days ago I glanced in the rear view mirror and happened to notice a few shiny hairs slightly above my right ear. I thought at first it was just the sun, but upon further examination at the next stop light it became more than clear that these were two straight up gray hairs, and long ones, too. There's no doubt about it, I even had a few of my students at school examine them to see if they thought they were gray. At first I thought it was sort of scary and I thought myself too young to have such hairs on my head, but the more I've thought about it these two hairs have made me feel good about myself. I have left behind the desire to impress with appearance, and hair has never really been a high priority for me (In fact, I've dwelt in a perpetual state of bed-head most of my life). But these two gray hairs have got me thinking about things.

I wonder how much my two kids are to blame. Probably a lot. I feel like I've grown up quite a bit in the past three years, but I'm nowhere near being the kind of person I want to be. I've always noticed those guys who have kids and still wear baseball hats and have always wanted to be that way. They wear their hat and you can see the gray coming out below by their ears, but they could care less because they've earned it, but they don't care that they've earned it. You see them at their kid's soccer or baseball games and they are comfortable in their own skin. They probably are going bald, too, but that as well doesn't really matter. You watch them go to their car and you can see it's more like a traveling locker room/office/book shelf. They know there is no way for their car or their house to be clean for more than a few hours, but it's ok that way. It will just be like that until their kids are 18.

We were spending the evening with a couple that has two teenage daughters last weekend and I was so impressed with their way of going about life. She warned me that their house was a mess as we went in, but it wasn't really that bad. It was just lived in. There was track stuff all around and the walls were covered with framed pictures of their family. As we ate pizza with them and listened to all the stories about daily events and people we didn't know, it was like experiencing a miracle. They poked fun at each other and got embarrassed at some things but most of all they laughed and enjoyed the evening. I loved it. These were the kind of people who lived life and didn't care too much about having their house look like a museum.

I think what these two gray hairs have done is make me excited about going through the daily stuff of life. They have made me excited that our kids aren't perfect and have helped me to realize it's not really all that important to follow the typical book/magazine time line for child development and when they should be off the pacifier or potty trained. I love that my 1 year old son wears a bike helmet all over the house and brings me his shoes, jacket, and hat when he wants to go outside. I love how my daughter yells at me to be nice to her brother when I yell at him. It just seems like these are the sort of gray hair kind of stuff that those hat wearing dads have all been through. As uncertain as things are and will always be, I have this appreciation and deep awe for those men who sport the gray hair with pride and are still rolling. They've been serving the Lord for years and aren't showing any signs of slowing down. No chance. They've been clueless fathers about how to raise kids but have found a way to love and serve and teach despite countless mistakes. These are the kinds of things that make me excited to be that gray haired hat wearing guy driving a messy car but loving every minute of it.