trying to process

i'm not a very committed blogger and in recent days i have avoided writing anything new because of all that has happened in the last week. going back to loveland for the funeral was a very unexpected venture for everyone. i don't know how to process through my thoughts about dan, the brothers, and the church community there. i still don't know what to think or how to feel. to be quite honest i'm so confused and have more questions each day and no answers to go with them. the only resolution my heart has come to is that maybe we don't need to know answers. maybe there aren't any. i guess that will have to suffice.

the hardest part for me is to put myself into the brother's shoes. i love you guys and can't possibly feel the way you must feel. i'm so sorry and wish there was something we could do to lessen the pain. i'm just glad to know you and for what it's worth to walk next to you, even if we all live so far apart. you guys are my friends and i love you all. that will never change. seeing God's church come together like it did last week showed me that there's a lot of love out there.

thanks for being who you were, dan, and not trying to be anyone else. i think we're all striving to follow your example. you were about as real as they come. thanks for that.  

thanks for that.